We are the main characters in our own story, but unlike the stories we know, there is so much that is unknown. Who we trust is a big factor in what we do. How we conduct ourselves can be seen in who we are, but in the real world where so many of us have so many different experiences, it is too hard to tell whether or not someone is what they seem.

I have struggled with a lot. I still do. Not unlike many of you reading this now. That’s what we were taught that this world would be… a struggle. A giant climb that has risks at any turn. A fact of life, no doubt, that many of us have come to terms with.

However, our struggles and our obstacles are not something we should bear alone. Being independent and being alone is not always the same thing…in fact, I don’t think they ever are. We choose to be independent. That part of life that gets hard is tackled through independence, our ability to put our own foot down and keep pressing forward is how we survive, and that’s to our own choice. Being alone is something different. It’s more than just being by yourself. It’s not being present, it’s not being recognised…it’s not being heard.

As humans, we are in some way pack animals. We love interaction, we build off of that. Our communities and societies work in that we speak to each other in some way, shape or form. We’ve developed modes of communication for those who can listen and those who can not. We can talk to people all over the world through words on a screen and videos sent from the palm of our hands.

So why do we all still feel alone?

Those late night deep thoughts that consume and feed off of your sleep, they haunt you and I. In particular, it is that one thought that really destroys us bit by bit every moment it comes to mind.
We know deep down inside that it is our biggest fear. To walk around this earth not being recognised. Having people move straight past you without a second thought. To have no meaning to anyone or anything. To not be heard or not be understood. To really be alone.

There is a whale out in the Pacific ocean that has been dubbed as the “Worlds Loneliest”. Scientists have been monitoring this particular whale for years because of one unique fact. Its call is significantly higher than that of any other Blue, Fin or Humpback whale they have encountered. Most of which call between 10-40 Hertz, the “Loneliest Whale” is said to call at 52 Hz. It was once said that because of this, the whale could not find a suitable mate. Its call was never received and was not heard by any of its kind… and so it wanders the oceans by itself.

There have been no reports of anything being wrong with him or her. The call being continuously heard for years indicates that he or she is healthy and has matured… but that doesn’t change how sad this story sounds.

We are not that different.

To be truly alone means to not be heard. Just like that whale, our biggest trials are when we feel like we don’t matter. No matter the cause or the reason, you and I will always go crazy if we are left completely by ourselves. Abandonment feels like a punishment and solitude, although beneficial at times, can hurt even the strongest of peoples.

Embracing loneliness isn’t bad, and at times being alone is good for you. It gives us a chance to think and evaluate ourselves, something that can be forgotten when surrounded by different types of people. However, being by oneself for too long keeps us from actually growing, and over time the very real thoughts of abandonment, lack of fulfilment and overall sense of loss, chips away at our being.

This is where who we choose to surround ourselves with is important.

We need people that will LISTEN.

Not when its convenient for them, not when they’ve finally heard your voice, but whenever you have something to say.

Whether they appreciate it is up to them, but having respectable and open-minded people who care about you and what you have to say, are part of the reason that you keep on going. What you represent is more than what you try and say. It’s the words that come from your mouth, it’s the way you look at something or someone and more importantly, it is what you do.

If nobody sees or hears it, then it was all for nothing. The right people will not only hear you, they’ll talk to you…they’ll make you better and better each and every day.

Life is too short to live it alone. We spend one-third of our lives sleeping…our dreams are where we find solitude. Yes, being by yourself is a good thing…but the people around us make life a whole lot better. There is no value on real friendships and there is nothing quite like being heard. The world needs you, and it won’t hear you unless you let it.