AS a young man the importance of fulfilling the wishes of your family has always been the standard in which I hold myself to. Among these wishes is what is considered to be a plan, in which every woman and man must follow for their life for it to be fulfilling.

I decided to follow a different path. My life was my choice and I thought the best thing for me was to understand that things could never go your way, no matter how much you plan it out.

But regardless of all of this, the idea of marriage was something I have always revered. It was something I have always planned on doing and something that, although being part of the traditional “plan”, was something I always had in mind. Mainly because from an early age I realized the importance of relationships, how difficult and, simultaneously, how amazing finding one person that you want to spend the rest of your life with can be.

 

Wedding season has just started for my family and I. Its usually a beautiful time of the year, but one can’t help but feel a little sad in the residing fact that one is still single and have been for quite some time. I guess when you look at a couple dancing, staring into each other’s eyes with such beautiful emotion, you can’t help but feel some type of way. I think and wish that despite being single and happy, hopefully, one day I can feel that way about someone special as well.

 

So naturally when the idea of people who love each other deeply cannot enter that union because of a legality, and because they are in love with someone who is of the same sex, frustrates me deeply. I’ve never tried to be political and controversial and having grown up in a somewhat conservative household, I understand the worry that some people have when the concept of gay marriage comes about.

 

I get it.

With so many factors in place and so many values and traditions being called into question, especially in the ethnic communities, the idea of same-sex marriage can somewhat be daunting. I know for a fact that many families in my friend circles have had a strong stance against it. And whilst personally, I disagree with their opinions, I understand that it in no way stems from hate, but rather a deep-rooted sense of culture that was so heavily embedded in their own lives.

 

This discussion has been brought up many times in and amongst my close friends and family. Most say that they will vote yes whilst others saying that they are going to vote no. For the most part, the latter group of people has no form of hatred towards men and women who are gay, but rather cite religious and cultural reasons as to why they do not agree with the legalization of gay marriage.

To that, I have to say this.

The nation-state of Australia and its legal system is a government and society that is free and separate from all religions. The laws, groups, and individuals that govern this country are to separate the state and religion on all matters. This means that Australia and Australians are not to be governed or judged through any specific form of religion, tradition or culture, but rather through rules, laws, and regulations that are reflective of a harmonious society, one that strives for peace, justice, and coexistence.

 

 

And whilst the Australian way of life was founded on basic Christian principals, the world in which we now live in has changed. Society has less become about church on Sundays and more about the Sunday BBQ.

People have come from all over the world and settled in this country, in search of a better life, one free from persecution and war, or for a new, and better chapter in their lives. The time to judge based on old values is coming to an end. Instead, we must accept everyone into our communities, provided they are not a threat and do not seek to hurt or be a negative influence. Coexisting is the key and seeking to understand the other side is a vital step in making a difference for the better.

Look, I’m not expecting everyone to understand the workings of a conservative community. Nor am I expecting all those from conservative backgrounds to understand everything about being gay.

But let’s just remember that it isn’t all about hate. And let’s also remember that in order to have a society that functions properly, we need to separate the law from any one group of people in any community.

 

Because the world is for everyone. Whether you’re gay, straight, black, brown or white, we all have to live together. And everyone deserves the right to live and love whomever they want.